Ace Cries Out

As you know from a previous blog, Asab had been put in a Children's Psychiatric Hospital in Seattle. He was having such a hard time adjusting to his mother's disability so he was acting out in many different ways. When he threatened to kill himself, Peggy called a social worker. The social worker said to him, " I hear you want to kill yourself." He told her yes. She asked, "How would you do this?" He said, "I'll take a knife and stab myself in the heart." When they realized that he was not just threatening, but actually had a plan, the social worker suggested counseling. After some counseling his behavior did not change and he still threatened to kill himself so he was put in the hospital. Things seemed to get worse there. He was being assaulted by other boys in the facility and it seemed that nothing was being done about it. We were concerned he would end up worse off than he was.

When he was transferred to Primary Children's Hospital in Salt Lake City, things seemed to be better. But I found out later that neither hospital had addressed his suicide threats at all. Their theory was to avoid saying anything about his threats. They only addressed other things. When I found this out I was very frustrated.

A year went by with Merrym and the kids making progress. We would deal with Asab's problems as they came. He never threatened to kill himself in front of me and if he did in front of Merrym, she really didn't mention it. Maybe she was afraid I would send him back to the hospital.

Then one evening I was at Merrym's house cutting her hair. Courtney was watching TV and Asab was sitting at the kitchen table pretending to do his homework. I kept saying, "Ace, get busy!" He was making every excuse not to do his work. Suddenly he pushed his school work on the floor and said he wasn't going to do it. I told him to get down and pick it up. He threw himself on the floor and said he wasn't going to. I went over, calmly picked him up, sat him on the chair and put his work in front of him. He threw himself on the floor again as soon as I moved away. I picked him up and sat him in the chair again. He screamed, "I'm going to kill myself!" I ignored him. He said, "I'm going to stab myself in the heart." That just hit me the wrong way. I walked over to the counter, grabbed a steak knife, walked over and put it in his hand. I said, "If you're going to kill yourself, do it now so I can watch." He look shocked. (I suspected that he was just trying to get his way.) I said, "Go ahead, do it. Come on I'm watching and you need to do it now!" He started crying and said, "I don't want to kill myself." I took the knife from him, hugged him and said, "I never want to hear you say that again." We never heard him make that threat from that day on.

If you see your brothers donkey or his ox fallen on the road do not ignore it. Help him get it to it's feet.
Deuteronomy 22:4

Love, Mother Hen Glory